Jaimi Willow
Ravenclaw
Fourth Year Animagus - Panther Veela[M:431:-7203:-3596:]
DESTINY... is not a matter of chance... it is a matter of choice...
Posts: 1,042
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Post by Jaimi Willow on Aug 6, 2013 10:41:19 GMT
Jaimi sat on the sofa her mind had produced, twisting her fingers in the hem of her skirt anxiously. Why had she waited a whole two days to tell him? The guilt had been eating away at her guts like poison. Did this make her a bad person? Her grandmother said not, curiosity about things like this was something a Veela would spend her whole life fighting.
The door opened and Jaimi looked up. Even seeing him made her smile. She was such a horrible person to have allowed this to happen. She had spent most of the last forty eight hours on the verge of tears and her eyes probably showed it.
"Hi." She could get any more words out of her mouth, her throat was suddenly dry and she couldn't look at him.
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Remus Lupin
Admin
Gryffindor Third Year[M:0:0:0:]
Posts: 271
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Post by Remus Lupin on Aug 6, 2013 11:09:17 GMT
Remus hadn't seen Jaimi in a couple of days, and was looking forward to his meeting with her. He walked through the corridors with a carefree air about him. Remus whistled a tune to himself.
Things had been going well for him recently, he was happy and the other guys were making some progress with doing their animagus transformations.
Remus walked into the room and smiled broadly, as she smiled at him. "Hi there!" He came over to her, and sat next to her. "What's up?" He asked, sensing something wasn't right.
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Jaimi Willow
Ravenclaw
Fourth Year Animagus - Panther Veela[M:431:-7203:-3596:]
DESTINY... is not a matter of chance... it is a matter of choice...
Posts: 1,042
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Post by Jaimi Willow on Aug 6, 2013 11:42:57 GMT
"Atticus Kaine got back to Hogwarts on Monday." she said, deciding it was best to start at the beginning. "On Tuesday lunchtime I was using one of the empty classrooms to get some work done because the library was packed. He must have had his next class in the classroom I chose because halfway through lunch he showed up." She took a deep breath, "He looked more like he did at the start of the year, as opposed to just before he left. It was strange."
"He said he'd heard about us, and how your childish pranks would get you into trouble and how you'd end up in Azkaban or something and I kinda lost it, Veela style." she swallowed. "I only ended up shouting at him thank Merlin and told him he was more likely to end up in Azkaban than you guys were because he clearly liked to do evil stuff. But when I went to leave he stopped me and said that if I wasn't going to remember him for anything good then the rest of the world may as well remember him for being evil." She said, trying to remember exactly what had happened, focusing on the facts rather than how she felt as a way of stopping herself from crying.
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Remus Lupin
Admin
Gryffindor Third Year[M:0:0:0:]
Posts: 271
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Post by Remus Lupin on Aug 6, 2013 12:13:24 GMT
Remus sat quietly, his hands clasped together on his lap. His knuckles whitened as he heard her talk of Aticus. He hated him, most of all, because of the way he was with Jaimi.
He waited patiently until she had finished,before he replied. "Do you think iit's a mistake seeing me?" He added quietly. "I understand, that you may have felt like you had to defend me, but I can't help feeling, that you aren't sure sometimes."
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Jaimi Willow
Ravenclaw
Fourth Year Animagus - Panther Veela[M:431:-7203:-3596:]
DESTINY... is not a matter of chance... it is a matter of choice...
Posts: 1,042
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Post by Jaimi Willow on Aug 6, 2013 12:29:47 GMT
"No I don't think it's a mistake," she replied, she hadn't even finished the story and he was already doubting her, she wasn't sure that she could go through with this. She wasn't brave, like him. "I will defend you to the ends of the earth, but you need to let me finish, you might not feel the same about me when I'm done."
"I told him..." she took a deep breath. "The first time I met Atticus was before anything had happened with you, kissing him was different to the way anyone had kissed me before, the way you don't kiss like anybody else does, you're all unique and that's something you need to hold on to cause not all girls kiss the same either. So I told him that was something I wasn't intending on forgetting." I only wanted to make him feel better I didn't mean it like I wanted him to..." she laughed bitterly to herself. "I care too much about people, I see someone hurting and I want to make it better, I can't help it. I guess that means I should be a healer."
She looked up at him finally, praying that he would hold her gaze, and give her the strength to tell him.
"He told me that out of all the magic I possess my kisses were the most dangerous, that I had a kiss that would make a man willing to go to war."
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Remus Lupin
Admin
Gryffindor Third Year[M:0:0:0:]
Posts: 271
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Post by Remus Lupin on Aug 6, 2013 13:14:25 GMT
He looked at her sheepishly, as she explained that she hadn't finished telling him. He felt a warm feeling inside, when she told him she would defend him to the ends of the earth.
Remus listened to her, as she spoke about what went on. He nodded in agreement about the differences in kisses. Though he didn't know first hand, as he'd only kissed Jaimi.
He kept his gaze on his feet, he didn't know where this was going, but he couldn't get the guts to speak right now. He did croak out a query. "what else happend?"
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Jaimi Willow
Ravenclaw
Fourth Year Animagus - Panther Veela[M:431:-7203:-3596:]
DESTINY... is not a matter of chance... it is a matter of choice...
Posts: 1,042
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Post by Jaimi Willow on Aug 6, 2013 13:30:13 GMT
He wouldn't look at her, he was looking at his feet.
"I should have left the classroom then, but I didn't. He turned me round to face him and I tried to walk away but I couldn't move." She couldn't stop the tears any more, each drop of salt water hit her hand reminding her of the pain she had caused him. Jaimi had thought keeping this to herself for two days was hard but this was even worse.
How could she have done this to him, this nice boy who had always been kind to her, who was sweet and gentle and she had done this?
"He kissed me, and I didn't stop him, not that I could have pushed him off if I had tried. I didn't even manage to slap him properly afterwards." she said bitterly. She couldn't look at him anymore, she thought this would make her feel less guilty, but it made her feel worse. It was out in the open now, her betrayal and she didn't think she'd ever be able to look him in the eyes again. "I'm sorry." she whispered as she gave in to the flow of tears.
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Remus Lupin
Admin
Gryffindor Third Year[M:0:0:0:]
Posts: 271
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Post by Remus Lupin on Aug 6, 2013 16:20:44 GMT
Remus kept his face down. He heard her words, her aplogy, and even her tears. The only thing that stayed ringing in his ears, was He kissed her, and she didn't push him away.
His emotions were in a turmoil. He was hurt, and he felt betrayed. He finally looked at her, she was sobbing freely, he wanted to comfort her, but he chided himself inwardly. Stop being sich a sap.That's why she could do this to you. Remus found his voice. "So he kissed you, and you half heartedly slapped him, after you responded to his kiss!" His voice was strained and he tried hard to not feel the lump in his throat. "I trusted you. You know how much you mean to me. How could you let him do that, and not put up some kind of a fight?"
He stood up and stomped over to the fire. He gazed at the flames, he never felt more alone, then he did right now.
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Jaimi Willow
Ravenclaw
Fourth Year Animagus - Panther Veela[M:431:-7203:-3596:]
DESTINY... is not a matter of chance... it is a matter of choice...
Posts: 1,042
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Post by Jaimi Willow on Aug 6, 2013 17:18:07 GMT
She sat there, waiting for him to say something, anything, and it took a while.
"It wasn't half hearted but he got his arm in the way." she looked at his back as he stood by the fire, silhouetted against it. "I tried, it isn't completely my fault. I didn't realise how hard I was going to have to fight against the Veela in me, you soothe that side of me. It was like he argued with me to bring it out and then turned the tables, I've never had to fight anything like that before, I didn't know what to do."
"I..." she stopped herself, there was no excuse for what she did. "I really am sorry Remus there's no excuse for what I did and I really don't expect you to forgive me. All I can do is hope that the guilt i'm feeling outweighs the pain I've caused you, because you don't deserve to hurt as much as this." She didn't want to lose him, but she would understand if he didn't want to see her again. She wouldn't blame him if he didn't trust her anymore, she didn't even know if she trusted herself.
All she knew was that his next words could break her heart.
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Remus Lupin
Admin
Gryffindor Third Year[M:0:0:0:]
Posts: 271
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Post by Remus Lupin on Aug 6, 2013 17:53:57 GMT
He listened to her, as an angry tear rolled down his cheek. He wiped it away stubbornly and sniffed. Remus stayed quiet as she finished talking. He turned to look at her, his anger ebbing slightly, as he gazed at her.
"I don't want to lose you Jaimi, but I don't know what to do." he admitted. "I feel like I want to hurt you, as much as I'm hurting now, but I can't." He walked back over to her and sat down. He rested his head against her shoulder. "I couldn't bear to not be with you Jaimi. I'm sure we can get past this, if you want to?"
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Jaimi Willow
Ravenclaw
Fourth Year Animagus - Panther Veela[M:431:-7203:-3596:]
DESTINY... is not a matter of chance... it is a matter of choice...
Posts: 1,042
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Post by Jaimi Willow on Aug 6, 2013 18:31:25 GMT
She watched as a tear rolled down his cheek and he wiped it away. She was the cause of that, she made this happen.
He didn't want to lose her, she couldn't believe it. When he walked over and sat down next to her putting his head on her shoulder she thought her heart might explode.
"Of course I want to!" She wrapped her arms around his waist. "I'll do whatever you need so that you can trust me again. Thank you."
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Remus Lupin
Admin
Gryffindor Third Year[M:0:0:0:]
Posts: 271
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Post by Remus Lupin on Aug 6, 2013 19:15:15 GMT
Remus was a little startled, as she put her arms around him. He smiled as she Talked of doing anything to make him trust her. "I don't want you having to work so hard at this. Lets just start again." He offered. Remus smiled and give her a peck on the cheek.
"Please try and keep your distance from Qtticus. I don't trust him more than I don't trust you."
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Jaimi Willow
Ravenclaw
Fourth Year Animagus - Panther Veela[M:431:-7203:-3596:]
DESTINY... is not a matter of chance... it is a matter of choice...
Posts: 1,042
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Post by Jaimi Willow on Aug 6, 2013 19:56:31 GMT
"O.k. start again. Thank you." she smiled as he gave her a kiss on the cheek. He mentioned avoiding Atticus. "I think that's a given." she said with a smile as she wiped the tears off her cheeks.
"I don't think I could look at him without feeling guilty anyway." she admitted.
Looking up at him she couldn't quite believe he was still here.
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Remus Lupin
Admin
Gryffindor Third Year[M:0:0:0:]
Posts: 271
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Post by Remus Lupin on Aug 7, 2013 17:59:59 GMT
Remus helped her wipe her tears, and smiled a little at her willingness not to see Atticus. "Thanks, it means a lot." he said taking a strand of her hair from her face, and tucking it behind her ear.
He couldn't help wondering what she could be thinking, as she looked at him. "Penny for your thoughts pretty girl."
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Jaimi Willow
Ravenclaw
Fourth Year Animagus - Panther Veela[M:431:-7203:-3596:]
DESTINY... is not a matter of chance... it is a matter of choice...
Posts: 1,042
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Post by Jaimi Willow on Aug 7, 2013 18:32:07 GMT
She blushed slightly when he called her pretty, allowing it to happen despite the fact that she didn't have to. Feeling his hands brushing her cheeks and tucking her hair behind her ear was starting to make the fact that he hadn't left seem all the more real.
"I just can't quite believe that you're still here. You have no idea how glad I am that you are here, but I still can't quite believe it." She looked into his eyes and felt butterflies spring to life in her stomach.
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